i never asked for a happy ending or a saccharine love story; i craved the tragic and the transitory, the fleeting and intense.
my way home from the GSB was strange today somehow - everything triggered way too vivid memories...if this was a movie it would have been misty fadeaways to a montage accompanied by cheesy music and glamorous reenactments. But this is life, so it was me walking a little slower and more thoughtfully, wistful and thinking of a one-night stand with a blurry face and a name that's slipped away, the rest of the scenario remembered - his roommate, her dog, the dinner he cooked me, the sweetest of goodbye kisses. And then moments i do still have, boys i do recall, just tucked away where i'd forgotten they existed...the abandoned church, the walk after class, throwing grass at each other and lying in the park. Winter break semi-romances with us both too cynical, losing the magic with the walk of shame.
it was strange, that's all. A chance overheard word, a street i haven't walked down in a while...sparking sudden startling forays into my head, into the past...getting Clem Snide stuck in my head, singing again and again I don't wanna know me better...
and then i check my messages and his voice is enough to make me smile and i feel silly in my smitten state.
Shakori Hills Grassroots Fest in NC:
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